Our Guide to... Planning your Second Wedding
If you've been married before, then you're likely to have a good idea of what to expect when tying the knot for the second time. But while second (and third) marriages are increasingly common, concerns about what may or may not be appropriate can still be a major source of anxiety for couples planning their big day. Hereâs our guide to navigating some of the issues and questions you might faceâŠ
Can you have a religious ceremony?
Every religion is different when it comes to second marriages: while some faiths may be opposed to you holding the wedding in a house of worship or having a religious ceremony for your second marriage, others may be more open. Ultimately, whether you decide to go ahead with a religious ceremony will need to be decided by you and your partner, in conjunction with your clergy person.
What size of wedding would be appropriate?
If your first wedding was a big celebration, it may feel inappropriate to host another large wedding, particularly if your previous wedding was relatively recent. However, if it will be the first wedding for one of you, then it may feel more appropriate to host a larger celebration! Ultimately, the choice is yours â though if it is something youâre concerned about it may be worth talking to trusted friends and asking for their honest opinion.
One way of handling this may be to host a small, intimate ceremony, followed by a large, less formal reception in the evening. Weâve been delighted to host these for couples holding their second wedding with us, with our Blue Room providing a perfect space for ceremonies for up to 40 guests and our Auditorium providing a space for up to 150 evening guests.
How should you involve your children in the celebrations?
One key factor in deciding what size of wedding is appropriate may be whether or not you have children from you previous marriage. If theyâre still young, they may be uncomfortable with a large wedding setting, particularly if they still find it difficult that their parents are no longer together. Of course, they may be very excited by the prospect of the wedding, and if so, should be encouraged to be involved â whether itâs as a page boy, bridesmaid or flower girl. If your children are older, you could ask them to do a reading, or even to give you away.
Should you invite your ex, or their family?
Itâs one of the more contentious issues you might face, but if youâre still on good terms with your ex, split amicably, and/or have children together, then you may well want to invite them to your wedding. Of course, if you or your new partner have any reservations about inviting them, then itâs more common not to and thereâs no obligation to invite them along either. They may well choose to decline the invitation, and you should respect their decision if so.
If youâve been widowed, then you may be wondering whether or not to invite your former spouseâs family to your wedding. If youâre still close to them, then thereâs no reason why you shouldnât include them in your celebrations, but again, they may have mixed feelings about attending. If they decide that it would be too difficult for them, then you should respect their decision and endeavour not to take it personally.
Can the bride wear white?
In recent years, the rules regarding bridal attire have relaxed significantly, with brides commonly opting for alternatives to the classic white gown. The general consensus now is that a bride should feel free to wear what she feels comfortable in on her wedding day, and this applies equally if youâre marrying for the second time! If wearing white doesnât fit right for you, then youâre well within your rights to decide this. Similarly, if you missed out on a dream dress first time round, and wish to pick something special, then feel free!
If you have been married before, then itâs likely that you will have a deeper understanding of the vows you plan to take and awareness of their significance, so if you have a gut instinct on what feels appropriate for you and your partner, you should follow it. Whether youâre widowed or divorced, falling in love again and deciding to spend the rest of your lives together is a chance to ensure your happiness for the future - what better reason is there to celebrate?!
If you'd like to find out more about getting married at The National Piping Centre, contact us on 0141 353 5551 or email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
Save the Date!
Wedding Walkaround
Sunday 2nd September
12noon-3pm
This weekend we host a Wedding Walkaround! Come to The National Piping Centre between 12noon - 3pm on Sunday 2nd September for an informal look at our wedding venue, chat with our wedding co-ordinators and find out how we can make your day one to remember forever.